Screwed

I am screwing my life.
I am a sad, sad soul.
I am giving way to fear and sadness to corrupt my mind.
I am loathing myself.
I am steering ppl further n further away from me.
I am confused by my own actions.
I am misguided by my own principles.
I am expecting nothing for i dont know what to expect.
I am feeding myself lies which i know too well are lies.
I am hating ppl but i know the only person who had hurt me is myself.
I am empty..not even half empty, let alone half full.
I am unforgiving, so I hurt bad when karma strikes.
I am good at making mistakes, and I never learn from them.
I am wishing for a way out, but my view is confined by these walls of my cell.
I am losing my grip. I possess no more control. I am doomed.

OWH CRAP! I AM SCREWED!!!!!!!

(Ps: How's my first attempt at peom-writing? Sux huh? =D )

Time is running out!

Time is running out!

So what do i do?

PANICK!!!!!! And then in panick , i will try to get my many work done one by one. But the day is passing by soo quickly that i can't even keep up with it! Aduh aduh aduh! Thank God today was daylight saving day, for i needed the much-valued extra hour.

Owh a quick congrats to JMM sr n jr. U did great guys! Tak sia2 aku sakit tekak sokong korg!

Owh owh. Gtg. TA~~~!!!

(as u can see this post is completely nonsense. Just felt like updating my blog. Heh..)

Hello again!

Hello again!

Wow! Long time no blogging, huh? Not much has happened since i stepped foot in Chch for the fourth time last February. So I'm writing now in order to stop and have a look at my life so far.

I' m staying in Ilam Village, in a flat which i share with 5 other mat sallehs. Thank God they're not the party-is-my-way-of-life kind. But it also means that i hv to constantly wear my headscarves, even to the toilet. Adjusting to "single, lonely & independet" life isnt easy. First off, ive been dieting on tuna sandwich since the start of the semester. Or, I'd have frozen pizza. As someone who believes in a healthy diet (right...), I snack on apples and oranges. I just do not feel like cooking, at all! Maybe, just maybe, the reason being even if i did cook, id still eat alone. Heh, might just as well mkn roti dgn tuna jer!

On the weekends, I'd lepak at nama, aza, farra n ara's house. Man, when i see them, I start to talk non-stop and act real crazy. Pardon me, but whenever i finish class, i dont talk. coz there's no one to talk to. So, in a way, Im much quieter this year. That's good right? =/(kurang dosa ngutuk org)

Third pro is killing me...slowly but definitely. U must think, "then why do u bother to blog?". I'd say, "if i didnt, id go crazy!!!!!!!!!!" And i'm not joking. And this 4mx3m room in which i stay isnt helping either. For goodness sake, there isnt enuff space for me to skip!! Plus ive been sleeping pillowless for almost a month (my bad la kan, sape soh malas sgt nak beli bantal...) And the walls are soo thin i could hear (and probably participate with) ppl conversing outside.

Tarian, tarian, tarian. Again. This weekend. Twice. Two days. In a row. Dont get me wrong, I LURVE DANCING. I could dance with my eyes closed. Yet, i dont find it fun anymore. and i blame that on study workload! God, why does it ruin everything!!!!!?????? Plus, i think we need new dance routines coz the old ones are getting boring, both to the audience and dancers. And the Malaysian Carnival in April will sure demand a lot from me and the team. Perhaps, it's time for me to let others do the work. Perhaps, ive had enuff of this dance thingy (cant belief i just typed that!)

SEE! I knew I would complain! Maybe i shouldnt blog anymore, coz my ppl mite hv the impression that Im an ungrateful b****. But then, who cares abt what ppl think? My life (or the lack of it) is already on a roll with such a high velocity that i cant control my direction and speed anymore. (dammit, even my anology sux!)

I think what i need right now is sleep.

I'm off to bed!

Hello again!

Hello again!

Wow! Long time no blogging, huh? Not much has happened since i stepped foot in Chch for the fourth time last February. So I'm writing now in order to stop and have a look at my life so far.

I' m staying in Ilam Village, in a flat which i share with 5 other mat sallehs. Thank God they're not the party-is-my-way-of-life kind. But it also means that i hv to constantly wear my headscarves, even to the toilet. Adjusting to "single, lonely & independet" life isnt easy. First off, ive been dieting on tuna sandwich since the start of the semester. Or, I'd have frozen pizza. As someone who believes in a healthy diet (right...), I snack on apples and oranges. I just do not feel like cooking, at all! Maybe, just maybe, the reason being even if i did cook, id still eat alone. Heh, might just as well mkn roti dgn tuna jer!

On the weekends, I'd lepak at nama, aza, farra n ara's house. Man, when i see them, I start to talk non-stop and act real crazy. Pardon me, but whenever i finish class, i dont talk. coz there's no one to talk to. So, in a way, Im much quieter this year. That's good right? =/(kurang dosa ngutuk org)

Third pro is killing me...slowly but definitely. U must think, "then why do u bother to blog?". I'd say, "if i didnt, id go crazy!!!!!!!!!!" And i'm not joking. And this 4mx3m room in which i stay isnt helping either. For goodness sake, there isnt enuff space for me to skip!! Plus ive been sleeping pillowless for almost a month (my bad la kan, sape soh malas sgt nak beli bantal...) And the walls are soo thin i could hear (and probably participate with) ppl conversing outside.

Tarian, tarian, tarian. Again. This weekend. Twice. Two days. In a row. Dont get me wrong, I LURVE DANCING. I could dance with my eyes closed. Yet, i dont find it fun anymore. and i blame that on study workload! God, why does it ruin everything!!!!!?????? Plus, i think we need new dance routines coz the old ones are getting boring, both to the audience and dancers. And the Malaysian Carnival in April will sure demand a lot from me and the team. Perhaps, it's time for me to let others do the work. Perhaps, ive had enuff of this dance thingy (cant belief i just typed that!)

SEE! I knew I would complain! Maybe i shouldnt blog anymore, coz my ppl mite hv the impression that Im an ungrateful b****. But then, who cares abt what ppl think? My life (or the lack of it) is already on a roll with such a high velocity that i cant control my direction and speed anymore. (dammit, even my anology sux!)

I think what i need right now is sleep.

I'm off to bed!